DATA: Data to Commander Riker.
RIKER[through the Com system]: What is it? Thou hast interrupted my beard strengthening exercises.
DATA: Forgive me, sir. But a harrowing and vexing spirit hast appeared on the bridge.
RIKER: Indeed? I shall be there anon.
He is there anon.
RIKER [Seeing the GHOST]: O God! What vile devil hast taken the most virtuous shape of my dearest Troi?
GHOST: 'Tis I, Troi! Victim of murder most foul!
RIKER: But I thought you were on Risa!
GHOST: Alas, the gold leotards did chafe so.
RIKER: Murder!
GHOST: Hear this! While I was being anointed with fragrant oils by a bemuscled and naked Bajoran, a leprous destilment of poison was poured into my raktajino!
RIKER: O, fie! O Earth! O Ferenginar! O Cestus III!
DATA [Aside to GEORDIE]: Something is rotten on the bridge of the Enterprise.
GHOST: And the villain that stung your lover's life...now sits in the captain's chair!
RIKER [Tearing at his beard]: O, HORRIBLE! MOST HORRIBLE!
GHOST transforms into Q.
Q: Just kidding. LOL!
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